hoodie_time | Entries tagged with self-esteem issues

ever-dimming.livejournal.com

Like previos episodes, this one has shifting POV's that include Dean's. A reminder: this is a Sam-centric fic, but it definitely dives into Dean's internal struggle as he deals with his own trauma.

Title: Away from These Shores (11/?)
Author:

ever_dimming
Genre: Gen
Summary: A simple hunt leaves Sam in an altered state no one seems able to explain – at first. Pulling him out of it is not nearly as easy as it should be, especially since Dean is dealing with his own trauma(s).
Triggers / warnings for this episode: Past suicidal ideation (and then some) in one paragraph; Dissociation (mostly not Dean's, for now); post-trauma, flashbacks, past violence & torture in hell and the Cage; quick reference the Winchesters' painful upbringing.
Spoilers: The fic is standalone, but refers to the plot up to and including 8X01 here and there.
Disclaimer: Supernatural, its characters, plot lines etc. belong to their awesome creators. I am merely suggesting fun new ways in which those beloved characters could suffer and/or be comforted.

He remembers his father’s arm around his shoulder, his eyes dark and worried, his voice doing that thing it did whenever he was feeling too much and decided to feel nothing at all. I know you miss him, but you can’t fall apart on me like that, we’ve got a job to do.

He remembers trying.

ever-dimming.livejournal.com

*A/N: I deleted my own post last year about this WIP while going through a bad bout of anxiety. So, seeing as I've added a few new chapters since then, I thought I'd re-post. I really hope that's okay (and my apologies if I miss any PM's -- I'm apparently a complete moron, because I cannot for the life of me work the LJ inbox anymore. Not sure why).

***
This started out as a Sam-centric fic, and it still is, so fair warning about that; but my fondness for Dean and his struggles snuck in soon enough. So, this fic has caretaker!Dean who is also increasingly revealing and dealing with his own trauma, and we get his POV as well. I think that might be relevant here. The next chapter I'm working on seems to be relatively Dean-heavy, too.

Title: Away from These Shores (10/?)
Author:ever_dimming
Genre: Gen
Summary: A simple hunt leaves Sam in an altered state no one seems able to explain – at first. Pulling him out of it is not nearly as easy as it should be, especially since Dean is dealing with his own trauma(s).
Triggers / warnings: A lot of dissociation (mostly not Dean's, for now); occasional self-harm in later chapters; post-trauma, past violence & torture in hell and the Cage; occasional mentions of the Winchesters' painful upbringing. Some grief, since in this slightly AU Cas did not survive Swan Song, and Bobby & Ellen are around (but Jo is gone).
Spoilers: The fic is standalone, but refers to the plot up to and including 8X01 here and there.
Disclaimer: Supernatural, its characters, plot lines etc. belong to their awesome creators. I am merely suggesting fun new ways in which those beloved characters could suffer and/or be comforted.

on AO3: from the beginning, or latest chpater (10)

boysinperil.livejournal.com

It's only the first chapter, and it's not quite edited the way I want it to be, but I also want feedback on my voice and pacing, etc. So! Please go listen and let me know what you think!

On AO3

toratio.livejournal.com

Title: But a Flesh Wound
Pairing: Gen
Author:

toratio
Rating: M
Word Count: ~ 800
Summary: You're a big brother, and you have responsibilities - one jammed wrist is nothing to worry about
Disclaimer: I don’t own Supernatural
Warning: Some violence (show level), some angst and references to Sam's hell hallucinations (set in season 7), told in second person

Written for a friend who wanted some Dean hiding an injury.

At my journal

anactoria.livejournal.com

Title: A Path of Cinders
Characters/pairing: Dean/Cas
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 6000
Warnings/contains: Angst, violence.
Summary: AU version of 10x03 "Soul Survivor". Dean lost the Mark of Cain when the demon cure took effect -- but he lost himself, too. He lies unconscious in the bunker, lost in his guilt. Castiel walks in dreams to find him.

Read on: LJ | AO3

supernutjapan.livejournal.com

Title:Fun House (AO3)

Summary:Sam and Dean Winchester are picked up by a travelling circus while they are very young. The circus is a very dangerous place for two young boys and Dean must give up a part of himself in order to protect his brother.
Timed a few months after Shattered Pieces. A chapter of revelations, heartache and turmoil for both Dean and Sam. The start of a new beginning.

Rating: Explicit
Warnings:Graphic depictions of violence,rape/non-con underage,sexual slave, angst, brother feels, hurt Dean, hurt Sam, wincest feels
Fandom:Supernatural (AU)
Series: Part 6 of the The Boy in the Mirror (AO3 here) series
Author's Notes: A BIG THANK YOU TO

siennavie for art,

karakuri_doll for beta and encouragement.

kalliel

Title: Childhood I
Genre: gen, pre-9x04 "Slumber Party," exhausted Dean headspace
Characters: Dean (POV), Kevin; Linda and John by extension; a bit of Sam
Rating: R
Word Count: ~3,700
Warnings:

masturbation, brief non-explicit mentions of past underage, talk of prostitution

Summary: What happens on the "Dean and Kevin go get falafel" trip stays in the "Dean and Kevin go get falafel" trip.

--

Title: Childhood III
Genre: gen, 9x23 "Do You Believe In Miracles?" tag
Characters: John (POV), Dean; Millie Winchester (pre-series)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~3100
Warnings:

use of racial slurs/the Vietnam War/Red Scare rhetoric, reference to suicide (non canon character)

Summary: In the moment between Dean's soul failing to ascend to Heaven, and Dean's soul returning to Earth a demon, John catches it. And, inasmuch as one can speak to an amorphous ball of sound and light and memory, they have a chat.

NB: Childhood is a three-part series set across S9 about childhood, parenthood, and how they weave into one another. Each part is thematically connected to the others, but can stand alone!

sweetcornjesus.livejournal.com

Title: Spat out
Author: friendlydeathray
Genre: H/C
Characters/Pairings: Sam, Dean, no slash
Warnings: Language
Spoilers: Spoilers for S11 ep. 17
Word count: 4678
Summary: CODA to S11 EP 17 'RED MEAT' - After Dean's drug over dose he starts to experience some serious side effects that land him in urgent care. Sam has no idea what is wrong with his brother and when he finally finds out the truth about what Dean did, Dean's insecurities and mental health issues have to be spoken about.
Authors note: I wrote this cause everything 'human' in this show goes without human consequence lol like you don't just over dose, not get any real follow up medical attention and just go home all fine and dandy! Also wrote this cause I like to make dean cry heh

AO3

supernutjapan.livejournal.com

Title:Shattered Pieces

Summary:Sam and Dean Winchester are picked up by a travelling circus while they are very young. The circus is a very dangerous place for two young boys and Dean must give up a part of himself in order to protect his brother. Timed 3 months after Broken - Sam is struck with a mysterious illness. Dean has to ask the Master for help, which comes at a steeper price than Dean could ever know.
Rating: Explicit
Warnings:Graphic depictions of violence,rape/non-con underage,sexual slave, gangbang, angst, brother feels, hurt Dean, hurt Sam
Fandom:Supernatural (AU)
Series: Part 5 of the The Boy in the Mirror (AO3 here) series
Author's Notes: A BIG THANK YOU TO

siennavie for art,

vyperdd and

wind_storms for beta and suggestions<3

frozen_delight

SPN Reverse Bang Challenge 2015
Prompt Number: S2027
Art Title: CRACK |-| Artist:

zephyrchrysalis

Fic Title: CRACK |-| Author:

frozen_delight

Fandom/Genre: SPN, Angst |-| Pairing(s): Gen. Dean, Sam, Amara
Rating: PG-13 |-| Word Count: ~ 6800
Warnings: Dark themes. Spoilers up to and including 11x06 “Our Little World”.

Summary: The Darkness is coming. It’s so peaceful. It’s coming for all of us.
Post-11x06 AU in which Dean is hit by a crying curse and nothing is the same.

Art Link(s): Graphics - LJ |-| Fic Link(s): LJ | AO3

mad-server.livejournal.com

Title: Lonely Like You
Vidder: mad_server
Characters: Dean/Amara, Sam, Castiel, and Mildred from 11.11
Music: Crash and the Boys, "We Hate You Please Die" (from Scott Pilgrim)
Length: 1 minute
Warnings: Self-harm of sorts, some blood, arguably sexual and emotional abuse
Rating: PG-13?
Spoilers: Through 11.11

sw0rdy.livejournal.com

Title: Heaven Talks, But Not to Me
Author:

sw0rdy
Pairing: Sam/Dean (eventually)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 6,638
Summary: Dean says yes to Michael and together they avert the apocalypse. Now he and Sam have got the opportunity to lead normal lives, but Dean’s reluctant to let Michael go...
Author's Note: Majestic_duxk wanted brotherly angels and I'm sorry that this may only loosely address your prompts, hon, but if it's any consolation, this hardened gen writer wrote Wincest for you! :) I also must say a HUGE thank you to my wonderful, wonderful beta

thruterryseyes, who never batted an eyelid when, barely a day ago I emailed her going 'arghhhh, can you look over this for me please? BTW, it's got to be posted by Christmas!' Not only did she wave her magic wand over it, she also did art. Seriously, hon, you're awesome. Anyway, all that's left for me to say (since it's after midnight here in the UK) is MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

Heaven Talks, But Not to Me

supernutjapan.livejournal.com

Hi, everyone. My first fic posted here. This is the first in a series but can be read as a stand-alone.
If there is anything missing, or any more ideas or errors in tags, please let me know.

Title: The Boy in the Mirror ( AO3)

Author:

supernutjapan

Characters:Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester

Rating: Explicit

Word-count: 772

Spoilers: none - AU

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence,Rape/Non-Con Underage

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters Sam and Dean Winchester. They belong solely to the creators of the TV show Supernatural.

frozen_delight

Title: A Walk in Space
Author:

frozen_delight
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Angst, incest, bloodplay, bondage, consent issues.
Spoilers: Up to and including 10x14 “The Executioner’s Song”.
Word count: ~ 12,300
Beta: My eternal gratitude (and some ducks) to the fantastic

misplaced_ad who actually went through this monster of a fic twice. All remaining mistakes are mine of course.
Summary: Being together with Sam was like a walk in space without protective suit or oxygen tank. More often than not, Dean felt like he was drifting among the stars, weightless, breathless, completely out of his element.

Read here: LJ | AO3

anactoria.livejournal.com

Title: Take Me To The Bridge
Author:

anactoria
Artist:

little_jade
Characters: Dean, Sam, Cas, OCs
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Animal cruelty.
Word count: 23,000
Summary: It’s supposed to be a routine hunt. A few farm animals mutilated a few towns over. It sounds like the work of some two-bit demon—just another day at the office for two experienced hunters and an angel.
But this case is closer to home than it seems. Before long, Dean is in the clutches of a dangerous spirit, and Sam and Cas must try to end an ancient family feud before the whole town—and Dean—gets caught in the crossfire.

LJ | AO3 | Art masterpost

sw0rdy.livejournal.com

Title: Every Day is Exactly the Same
Author:

sw0rdy
Artist:

liliaeth
Rating: R
Warnings: Bad language, show level violence.
Word Count: 72,800
Spoilers For Season 10
Author's Notes: Written for the 2015

spn_j2_bigbang. My heartfelt thanks goes to the wonderful

thruterryseyes who has betaed the fic and helped shape it into the story it is now. After some last-minute alterations, any remaining errors are mine. She’s probably very glad it’s time to post it as she’ll kill me if I fiddle with it anymore! Thank you, hon. Seriously, you've been awesome. The wonderful art to accompany the story is by Liliaeth. Check out her masterpost here

Summary: Set over several years, starting in Season 10, directly after 'The Things We Left Behind'. Shaken by the massacre of the loan sharks and with no way to remove the Mark of Cain, Dean agrees to the next best alternative: retirement. Their peaceful new life doesn't last long however. When Abaddon abducts Dean after securing the First Blade, she’s got the perfect new weapon of mass destruction to take Hell from Crowley. Sam battles to rescue Dean who must then endure withdrawal from the Mark’s effects within the bunker’s panic room.

Fearful of the same happening again, Dean gets himself detained in a secure psychiatric hospital where he convinces the doctors that he’s got paranoid schizophrenia. Reluctantly respecting his brother’s wishes, Sam goes back to studying law and leaves Dean where he wants to be. Three years later, while still looking for a way to remove the Mark, Sam stumbles across a prophecy that Lucifer will rise and will only be stopped by the bearer of the Mark, forcing Dean leave his hiding place and take up the Blade one last time...

Fic on LJ

Fic at AO3

ART Masterpost

anactoria.livejournal.com

Title: Give Me That Old-Fashioned Morphine
Author:

anactoria
Characters/pairing: Dean/Cas
Rating: R
Warnings: Mentions of Dean’s drinking problem; violent thoughts; spoilers through 10.13.
Word count: 5500
Summary: Cas tries to help Dean deal with the Mark of Cain. Problem is, Dean's doing the opposite of dealing.

Read on: LJ | AO3

toratio.livejournal.com

Title: Faith
Pairing: Gen
Author:

toratio
Rating: PG
Word Count: 140
Summary: It's time for Sam to grow up
Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, or its characters, but I do have slippers and an oatmeal spoon!
Warning: Minor spoilers for ep 10x12, angst

Just a short little ficlet idea that came to me after the beginning of 'About A Boy'. I haven't posted to this comm much, but it seemed the right place for it.

( I believe )

Current Mood: accomplished
Current Location: Flinders Uni

sw0rdy.livejournal.com

Title: Most Likely To

Author:

sw0rdy

Summary: “Dude, if a shrink interviewed us at that age, you think the report would be all kittens and rainbows? Come on.”

Rating: PG-13

Genre/pairing: Gen

Spoilers: Episode tag for Season 10, Episode 11 'There's No Place Like Home'.

Warnings: Bad language, mentions to possible violence, mental health issues.

Word count: 1,272

Most Likely To

procrastin8or9.livejournal.com

Title: An Attribute of the Strong (3/3)
Rating: PG-13 for language
Characters: Dean, Sam, mentions of Benny. Gen.
Word Count: This part: 5655. Overall: 13681
Warnings: Some spoilers for end of season 8.
Summary: Written for the prompt at hoodie-time: Whatever Dean was eating in Purgatory, it wasn't what you'd call well-balanced meals. And adjusting back to 'real' food is harder than he expected. Dean's thin, borderline underweight (despite Sam's bitching at him to eat something), and his immune system really isn't up to dealing with flu season...

Because I have some kind of bizarre attachment to this 'verse, and I'm sorry. But here are all three parts.

Part I
Part II
Part III

Hope it satisfies!

Current Mood: nervous
Current Music: Film Scores

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like a fever that just won't break.

tie fire around my heels, send me a-runnin' through the fields.

Entries tagged with self-esteem issues

Away from These Shores (11/?)

Away from These Shores (traumatized, caretaker Dean)

Podfic of Sharlot's Jai Guru Deva Om

But a Flesh Wound (fic)

Fic: A Path of Cinders

Fic: The Boy in the Mirror Part 6 - Fun House

[Fic] 2 fics - Childhood I & III - Dean&Kevin, Dean&John

SPAT OUT

FIC: The Boy in the Mirror Part 5: Shattered Pieces

CRACK - PG-13, Sam, Dean, Amara

VID: "Lonely Like You"

Fic: Heaven Talks, But Not to Me

FIC: The Boy in the Mirror

Fic: A Walk in Space

Fic: Take Me To The Bridge

Fic: Every Day is Exactly the Same

Fic: Give Me That Old-Fashioned Morphine

Fic: Faith

Fic: No Place Like Home Episode Tag - 'Most Likely To'

An Attribute of the Strong Part III

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January 2021

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